Mama Will Be Here Soon. (Mayet Where The [Bleep] Are You?!)

Today was a very uneventful, but exciting day. Because Sheazie Bear was here the whole day! His mom, my niece Mayet, dropped off before 7am, which was way before his waking time. Adding to the fact that we are practically strangers, he broke down in the most pitiful tearful sobs when his mom left for work in a hurry.

No more than 45 minutes later, he fell asleep. I don't know if it was because of the sheer exhaustion of the shock of being abandoned to Auntie Netty, the stranger; or if was the fact that he was awakened too early, interrupting his REM sleep. But the silence was sweet. At least I could get some work done while he slept for the next hour...

Two hours later...

Boy, that was a very long nap!

The sleep must have done him good because he was in good spirits, and hungry.

And then we hung out, attached at the hips.

Literally.

He would not let me go, or let me put him down.

Until he went down for his second nap of the day.

One hour later...

Jimminy Christmas, I thought only infants sleep this much!

Sheazie Bear wanted his ball.

Not to be confused with Preacher's and Sonya's balls.

Well, what's the harm in sharing.

JUST KIDDING! I wouldn't let Sheazie Bear put the

dogs' chew toys in his own mouth. That's just gross!

Sheazie Bear helped me edit pictures from our family's Grand Reunion.

And then...

Can you guess...

If you guessed he rode Preacher and Sonya like ponies, you're wrong.

If you guessed he fell asleep again, your absolutely right.

What is going on with this kid and sleeping?! He's 15 months old, not 15 weeks. Really? They sleep this much.

Imagine my excitement when he woke up from the dogs barking. Yay, we get to go the park already!

Auntie Netty, don't ever let my hand go, ok?

And then...

Sheazie Bear let go!

Sheazie Bear went down this kiddie slide just fine the first time. Then he wanted to have at it again. This slide is no more than 3 feet off the ground. And as you can see, the ground is covered with cushiony cedar chips. So, yes, I let him down the slide by himself. But this time, by some transverse binomial affecting the trajectory of a moving object, complicated by the law of gravity, his body ended up turning backwards as he slid downward, so that now he was facing me at the top of the slide. He fell of the end of the slide, on his back, with his legs pointing to the sky as if giving gravity a finger for being so darned obstinate about pulling everything to the ground.

Sheazie Bear wasn't hurt, but I couldn't help the panic that welled up in my belly.

Darned stupid panic! It made me lose my mind to take a picture of his belly-up position, feet straight up, arms bracing on his sides, and his head cocked forward in an attempt to right himself. It was hilarious!

Alright, Shea, so it wasn't that hilarious. I'm sorry for laughing. It might have been a tad scary for you for a split second. But you did get up with a mirthful laugh that only little angels can make.

Okay, okay, so you let out a short cry of panic first.

Whewh, walking the balance beam is hard work.

I'm going to take a knee for a moment.

Uh, Shea? That's not a knee... That's a squat.

That's a No. 2 squat.

Now don't get me wrong, I love babies. I don't mind the mess they make when they eat. I don't mind changing their wet diapers. But cleaning up a load, that's a whole other story. All my experience in babysitting, I've been able to avert this messy situation. Until now...

Suddenly, Sheazie Bear was sitting alot.

And see that face? That look of concentration that could shatter the peach and calm of a silent moment?

Oh, he's even gazing off into the distance, really concentrating...

Oh no. That's it. He's really dumping a load.

So we went home. And I will say, I did not pick him up so that the load stayed relatively contained in his diaper.

Oh hell no, I didn't take pictures of the massive clean-up when we got home. Ugh, it was all over his bottom.

Gag!

Sorry Mayet, I think I used up half the baby wipes and half the Sani Hands wipes in Sheazie Bear's day bag.

Eeeeew!

Did I already write gag?

Well,

GAG!

again!

And suddenly, Sheazie Bear looked depressed.

Aw, Shea, did I really gag that hard? I'm sorry. I really didn't mean to. It's just that it was, well, you know-

GAG!

... oh, sorry...

gross...

Sheazie spiked a sudden fever, and became extra clingy and sensitive.

And then I realized, he'd been drooling all day long, he chewed his food really funny - like a cow chews her cud. He must be teething.

Mayet, where are you? What am I supposed to do now?

Oh, but Sheazie Bear, sweet, darling Sheazie Bear was such a good sport. He just laid his hot body against me while he drooled.

Don't worry Shea, Mama will be here soon.